What did your mother say that made your jaw drop?

What! how could you do that?

Well the other day she came into my shop asking for the usual discount and mentioned that she had tickets for the wimbledon Tennis final but couldn’t go.

Well son “ I think I might have got you some tickets”

How should one respond to compliments such as "You are so special" and "I'm lucky to have met you" from a guy?

She said, “Oh no I can’t give you our tickets, if we can’t go, well we don’t go - it is just not done to give away final tickets.”

True - how I loved my mum!

“Mum why is my sister such a bitch!”

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Well I slept with the president of the Lawn tennis Association year ago, I think he may have remembered!!

What do you mean son?

Oh I said, can my wife have them she would give her right arm to see a Wimbledon tennis final?

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“Oh come off it mum what would be the point?”

What on earth has brought this on, said my mother?

So I said to my sister “ You mean to say that that you leave two empty seats rather than give them to your brother” I replied in astonishment. - “Well yes thats how it works in our circle!” responded my sister.

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Do you know what she said mum?

My mother said to me “ Why didn’t you speak to me about this before”

Well she is so snotty, O.K. she may have married a bit of money, I don’t know but she feels she is above everybody else.

Why is it that when the Democrats absolutely love everyone to be LGBTP, they don't even acknowledge that Barack Obama and his husband Big Mike are homosexual, and he is the first homosexual president of the USA?

About 30 years back, I was speaking with my mother.